Sunday August 8, 2010

I am quite depressed. Had a phone call saturday afternoon asking if this was the home of Gerald Rosenberg who went to school in Chicago and was a member of TEP fraternity. I informed him that Gerald was dead. He said he had been a classmate of his. I think it was the fraternity trying to ask for money. He was shocked and got off the phone quickly after apologizing to me. It has thrown me into a funk. Just feel awful and started crying and could not stop. Don't know what is wrong with me. Now I cannot sleep and it is 1:30 in the morning. Still miss him so very much and anniversary of his death is 27 September.

Have a feeling that life is but an illusion..... Does one really know?

Going to California on the 20th and looking forward to seeing my family but dreading the airflight. Am a terrible traveler. If I had someone to accompany me, don't think it would be so bad but I don't, so I am miserable.

Bella gets cuter by the day. She is a charmer. You can tell by her pictures. Can't wait to visit with her and teach her to walk.

Getting puppy in September. Hope I can handle it. Maybe it will make me happier. Beau's anniversary of his death is at end of month and this also has thrown me. I keep remembering how terrible it was for him and for me to lose him. Can't look at his picutre without crying. Now I can write out August, September and December for months I don't like anymore.